The Kinyodas Gazette - U.S.

Clergy, Linguists Find Common Cause in The Da Vinci Code

By Spicolli'

Published March 16, 2005 04:19 PM

PHILADELPHA, PA - Spruce Street outside University of Pennsylvania's Williams Hall erupted in protest as Post-Graduates in Linguistics joined forces members of the Roman Catholic Clergy in denouncing Dan Brown's book The Da Vinci Code.

"This book is a travesty of our faith, misrepresents the history of Mother Church and belittles the devotion of members of Opus Dei," said Monsignor O'Malley a priest at The Holy Blood of Christ church in Dryden. O'Malley continued, "Brown's assertions that Our Lord was married, that the current church was a conspiracy by the Roman Emperors to subvert the actual teachings of Christ and that various Catholic benevolent societies are dangerous, sadistic cabals bent on world domination must be held to account."

The students present seem to take a different tack. "The man is to literature what that crocodile hunter guy is to biology," said PhD. candidate Judith Roundstock. Stan Droibol, a teaching assistant and second year grad student, continued "the man thinks tour guide copy is a substitute for observation. The only mitigating factor for this drivel being turned into a movie is that his appalling prose will largely be absent. God have mercy if the directors opt for voice-over!" Droibol's exclamation touched off chanting by some of the ecclesiastic participants.


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